New Diseases in Malaysia

The Malaysian Ministry of Health is now asking the public to be on the lookout for symptoms of the following new contagious diseases.

ASSMA
Severe rashes around the mouth caused by kissing too much ass. The number-one disease in Malaysia amongst civil servants.

DIALARRHOEA
Uncontrollable urge to continually dial friends on mobile phone to share with them such important information as "I'm now on the monorail" or "I'm walking towards the car." Victims can be recognized by large, twitching thumb.

MEESLES
Blotchy skin condition caused by eating too many packets of instant noodles.

MULTIPLE SPOUSOSIS
Affliction whereby victims make frequent trips to Vietnam, Thailand,Indonesia, and China to take on additional brides. Middle-aged men are at significant risk.

YELLOW FEVER
Compulsion to date Asian females. Very common affliction amongst foreign elebrities and caucasian expatriates working in Malaysia. Also known as Pinkerton's Disease.

EKOR-TOTONUS
Flushed complexion, high blood pressure and sometimes depression at finding out one has not won any gaming numbers and lotteries.

HEAVYTITIS
Excessively large breasts. This disease comes in several variant strains........ Heavytitis A; Heavytitis B; Heavytitis C, and sometimes Heavytitis DD.

CYBERTENSION
Feelings of stress and panic caused by lack of internet access.

DYEBETES
A compulsive need to colour one's hair. Reddish brown tints are the most common symptom, but health authorities have reported a new strain of blond highlights.

CHICKEN TOX
Victims exhibit a great need to talk ****. Highly contagious. Spread by ordinary conversation, and may be exacerbated by good food and alcohol. Politicians and lawyers are especially susceptible. Incurable.

Clams

Ah clams, glorious clams! Clams with chili + fish prawn paste + peanuts! *Note to self: Freshness and cleanliness are of utmost importance. Eating one spoilt clam can leave a horrid taste in one's mouth, overpowering all flavours of subsequent clams. And not to mention it'll put you at risk of getting food poisoning.*

Thanks Darling, for enduring yet another horrible episode of cullinary carnage. *muaks*

Holidays are here! Time for some random blogging...

EOS is over! Was over last week actually, but was too lazy and tired to update then. Finally, I get to spend lots and lots of time doing absolutely nothing except eat, sleep and playing computer games. Am currently hooked on Silent Hill 3, a game which I bought when I was in college but didn't get to play until NOW. Funny though. The computer changed my difficulty level from "Normal" to "Easy" halfway through the game. No wonder the monsters were getting easier to kill. But that's weird 'cos it's not possible to switch difficulties halfway through. My com is screwed up anyway. After I got it fixed, it gets infected by a Trojan Virus. *sigh* Yet another round of reformatting I guess...

Okie, summary of what I've been up to:

Meng Lee's 21st birthday party last Saturday. After dinner, we went clubbing. That was like the 'virgin night out' for Calvin and me, who've never been to a club before. Sad or jakun, call it whatever you like, it was a good first experience. :) Very crowded and smoky though. Washed my hair the next day and I could still smell the smoke. Thank goodness I didn't get another bout of tinnitus this time. But one can never be too careful, though. Was supposed to go to watch Pussycat Dolls in Sunway Lagoon this time, but my instinct told me otherwise. I know some people make fun of me because of this. Some of the guys laughed when I said I wanted to wear ear plugs when I go clubbing. After 2 months of auditory torture (still continues, but much less now), I'd rather look dorky but well-protected. The ear plugs aren't really that conspicuous anyway. It's not like I'm gonna wear EAR MUFFS.

I'm like every clothes shop assistant's nightmare. The customer from Hell. Whenever I buy stuff, especially clothes, I'll scrutinize the item a million times, ask for a new one, examine the new one, then ask for ANOTHER new one, and scrutinize them all over again. It gets on people's nerves, I know. Even my Mom and sisters say that I'm being such a perfectionist. Xian-Nian doesn't complain that much, thankfully. But he does that "embarassed look" or that "Lemme-sit-down-somewhere-while-you-take-your-time-inspecting-every-fibre-of-thread" look. Take today, for instance. I went into C. Union in Pyramid. Tried on a top. Asked the lady to get me a new one. Examined the new one. Paid for it, then asked the her to take YET another one our to compare (the shopkeeper looking a little disgruntled already). And in the end I exchanged it again, only to discover later that the stitches were crooked on the inside. I didn't go back to change it though, that wouldn't have been too much already. Anyway the stitches were on the inside.

Haih. See la. Exchange some more. Should have taken the first new top she pulled out. Like what Mommy always say: "Aiyoh... Nothing is perfect!" But still...

Anyway, today's objective was to look for a 2-piece swimsuit. Looked around but nothing worth buying. Am going to Pulau Perhentian with Xian-Nian and the gang next month. Can't Wait!

The day before

Can't wait for it to be over. After that, I don't want to read another lecture note till next year.

'Romantic' afternoon getaway for stressed-out socially-deprived medical students

EOS 5 is a mere 5 days away... I'm stressed out, obviously. This is the first time I'll be sitting for an exam without studying the whole syllabus (still have foundation 2 and health issues, doubt I can cover those by next Monday). Wish me luck, 'cos I'm gonna need lots of it.

Went to the Medical Museum with Xian-Nian today to do some last minute mugging on FLMs and models. Was being rather sporadic, hopping from one system to the next. Not to mention that the place was packed with batchmates. Still need to get a good look at the Renal FLMs... *sigh* so many slides, so little time...

Anyway...

So there we were, sitting together quietly at the reproductive system section. With more than half a dozen plastic models of various male and female genitalia piled on the table. We sat there alone. *Insert romantic violin music* I flipped through some breast cancer notes while he fiddled around with the male reproductive tract. And as for romantic scenery, we had the 50 or so FLMs of various dead, diseased, deformed, bloody, purulent, malignant breasts, ovaries, vaginas and testicles. There were also some pots of cancerous breasts and uterine tissue floating in formalin.

Xian-Nian opened up his model and couldn't fix it back. So I had to put the dick back together for him.

Ah yes, this is the epitome of medical school romance.